Surrogacy Awareness Week 2024

Their journey began when Julia, suffering from fibroids and multiple surgeries, struggled with the ability to carry a pregnancy. They conceived their son through IVF, a blessing that shone a ray of joy in their lives.

However, after his birth, medical advice cautioned against another pregnancy, terming it too risky. It was an obstacle they hadn’t foreseen but it was the genesis of their exploration into surrogacy.

Deciding to go down the surrogacy path wasn’t easy. The couple initially hoped to conceive a second child naturally. However, when faced with unanimous medical opinion about the risks, their attention shifted towards surrogacy.

They embarked on a journey to learn more about the process, navigating their own reservations, largely fostered by negative portrayals in media where surrogacy is often presented as exploitative or purely commercial. It was the discovery of altruistic surrogacy in the UK, based on genuine connections and friendships, that sparked hope for their family expansion.

The waiting process for a surrogate has been an emotional journey for Julia and Alessandro. As introverts, they’ve had to step outside their comfort zone, engaging with new people, and sometimes feeling the process was competitive. However, they strive to remain patient, active, and hopeful, looking forward to finding their perfect match.

Throughout this process, Julia and Alessandro received immense support from their family and friends. Despite surrogacy not being legal in their home countries, Germany and Italy, their loved ones have shown eagerness to learn and understand the process, bolstering their courage.

During their journey, they encountered numerous misconceptions about surrogacy. To address these, they drew parallels with altruistic organ donation, explaining that surrogates undertake the journey out of a desire to help, rather than selling a baby. They highlighted the fact that surrogates do not consider the child their own but merely provide a temporary, loving and nurturing environment.

The couple sought a surrogate with whom they could develop a strong bond of trust and enjoy spending time with. They hoped for this relationship to extend beyond the birth, facilitating a meaningful connection between their child and the surrogate.

Julia and Alessandro were determined to be transparent with their child, ensuring they knew their unique birth story. They envisaged a lifelong relationship with the surrogate, allowing this to be a natural part of their child’s identity.

While navigating the UK’s surrogacy laws, Julia expressed a desire for legal reform to recognize the Intended Parents (IPs) as the child’s legal parents from birth, removing the unwanted burden of formal responsibility from the surrogate.

This journey has profoundly reshaped their perception of parenthood and family. Initially, Julia worried about the potential identity conflict a child born through surrogacy might face. However, as they delved deeper into surrogacy stories and community, she now believes that with age-appropriate communication and a strong relationship with the surrogate, a child can proudly identify with their surrogacy birth.

Throughout the process, they’ve sought support from fellow IPs, building lasting friendships within the community. These relationships offer a potential support network for their child, giving them a sense of belonging to a community with similar experiences.

In an unexpected turn, the surrogacy journey has served to strengthen Julia and Alessandro’s partnership. They’ve discovered new layers to their relationship and have come to rely on each other in difficult times. They offer advice to other IPs, encouraging them to connect with others on a similar path and learn from their stories.

Their journey, fraught with complexities and challenges, yet filled with hope, underlines the transformative power of surrogacy in creating families.